Friday, September 19, 2008

Mount Not So Saint Mommy Errupts

I'm a horrible, horrible super mean mommy. I've been sick for what seems like forever. For the first two weeks it seemed to help me be a better mommy. I was more sensative to their needs and hurts, but now, well I'm out of patience and pretty much hate the world. Today was the worst. I went to the DR yesterday and slept well, I was even able to eat, can't taste yet, but hey it was improvement. I still feel yucky and I'm tired of feeling bad. Enter one really naughty little boy, and oh how naughty he has been today. One naughty corner incident after another. I'm soooo past my breaking point. So, what to do I do. I bansih them to their play room with orders to behave or else. Well, I guess the or else was just too tempting for my son, so he pushed me again. Enter screaming, she is so scarey mommy, so scarey she even spanks the poor boy. I hate myself for that. Screaming is bad enough, but spanking... I really hate it when I resort to that. It is more of a reflection of me and my abilities than anything my children could ever do. Then my daughter requests permission to come out of the play room and sit by me. She wants to give me hugs and kisses to make me feel better. Oh, I'm sooo horrible. Then she goes outside to pick flowers. She brings in a bunch of daisies still attached to their roots and asks me to cut them for her. She goes back outside, only to come back in and ask me to come look at what she did with her flowers. I'm thinking the last thing I really want to do is go outside and I'm thinking what a sweet little girl she is. I go out and she has managed to plant her flowers. It is so cute. Of course they will die not having any roots, but hey, she managed to plant the flowers by herself. Oh, she is such a sweetie pie. Maybe some of her sweetness will rub off on me. I could really use it. And at least it's good to know my children don't hate me and even little man seems to be unfazed by my erruption. I wish I could forget as easily as my children.

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